She writes about past love and how powerful it is, that first love, and how it all comes back to you ....(except me because my experiences were quite unsexy. Unromantic. Unamazing.
I do really wish my first love was like, legitimately a love, love, but it's hard because I was young and I was mixing up love, infatuation and ahem, lust.
It got me thinking, about firsts and all that sheboom, and it reminded me of my first kiss.
Hardly romantic when a bloke is like eating your face and your mouth and you just don't know what to do because you're in the dark behind a pa auke (hibiscus bush) but you know that the whole farken village walks past the pa auke to go to the pool.
So you just stand there getting your face decided-suctioned by a prickly faced Italian who spoke no English.
Man oh man, my first kiss wasn't much to write about ...well, now it is.
It was awkward.com.
Before you decide I'm like a ...village bicycle or something like that, calm the bitch down, I was only doing the kisses, the real action didn't happen until I lost my virginity on my marital bed.
While the village celebrated and pigs flew in excitement,