Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Social Media and Grief (for me)

warning: This is a really depressing post and I suggest you don't read it if you want to be inspired or have a nice day.....chus walk away and quit now amigo.

Before social media, grief was kept in the confines of one's close circles.
Circles of real humans who speak, embrace, listen and grieve,
Together. In reality.

Today, I am plunged into grief constantly at the plight of a terminally ill child, losing a battle, battles, hope, losing something, everywhere. here, there,
...Someone/people who I have not met, but her/their suffering is on my screen, her last steps are played on vimeo and her last breath is reducing me to tears.
She is in America, she is in Samoa, she is in the UK, she is on Facebook.
I am here, far removed in terms of reality, but completely torn because it is grief magnified and hurting my soul here, alone in my insignificant corner of this world.
I, and no doubt every other person seeing this on facebook is affected by someone's loss, someone they'd otherwise not have known in real life, outside of social media.
This is the price we pay for being constantly connected. Our connections come with the highs and lows and losses of humanity. We can try to avoid it, or go past but at the end of the day, we are only human. 
We are emotive, flawed, curious, connected beings.

Then, just when I thought I had just kicked myself in the head for being a sookie, my older sister writes a note about our beloved sister, Salafai who left us too soon.

"I thought of you today and wept, I realised I don't have a picture of you. My mind is grasping at the pieces of memory I have with you! 
Forever in my heart Salafai!"

ARGH! - yes she is my most beautiful sister, tall, brown hair, gorgeous face, but she has been gone for so long. And I do not remember her much. She was just a girl. about to enjoy her teen years. Gone. 

But strangely, my grief was not for me. But rather, for the mother of Salafai and the sisters and brothers of Salafai, and the grandmother and cousins of Salafai who were robbed of her life and her being.

People say time heals, and they are probably right, but sometimes, it also comes in waves and it catches you unaware.

Now, I have no advice for you about all this...rather than to say, Get Help. Talk to someone. I am grieving about other people's grief and I need to snap out of it and get back to my riveting work.

...Yet another reminder about why I blog, to serve absolutely no real purpose,.

Thank you

Goddess of Makagaga

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