Sunday, September 29, 2013

I will Abstain.

This week, 

I am attempting to Abstain.

From Facebook.

From this blog.

From my virgin blog.

From irrelevant online fuckenpigshoot.

But hopefully not from some kama sutraic interaction. 

Good night.

Goddess of Abstinence

The complexity of an archaeological site in Samoa The past in the present.

Helene Martinsson-Wallin Gotland University, Visby, Sweden 

I just stumbled upon a journal article about Pulemelei (Tia Seu) and it's written by the above archaeologist, one of the people who were there during the 2004 excavation. 

That's the ceremony I was trying to describe, except I was distorting it a bit by saying it was more of a liutofaga....which is what we do when we're re digging up a grave and we have to a  do a blessing because we are disturbing the resting/sleeping place of a loved one.
This academic tells it having interviewed key people who were there. So her take makes for an interesting read. 

On a lighter note, I am laughing at the description of the land issues goodness it's a lot neater in academic writing than in reality...oi Aue.

But now, on a very serious note, this writer exposes a truly sad fact about our disregard for our cultural heritage. Again, that is my interpretation but truly,...look at the many historical (both pre and post colonial ) places of significance that have been bulldozed to the ground? 

The most recent being the Jubilee Church in Malua. be replaced by possibly a large, aluminium "I'm bigger and shinier than the Methodist and Catholic" churches. 

The Original Fale fono? Gone. 

The rock that was throw by Vaatausili at the Tolotolo?  ...yeah ..that's where the road runs today. Not important.

Part of the foundation that is the star mounds in Palauli? ....widely used to build pa maa (rock walls) to keep the pigs in.
I know the academic here points to intelligent reasons for this oversight, like our divisive land issues and ownership but even more so, ...let's be realistic, ...where there is no money, ...there is no value placed. 

Saturday, September 28, 2013

A green project in Piu, Samoa

Here's your chance to use your donation to make a real, positive impact in the world with some exciting technology, and really see the truly transformative results!

Help make a real difference for the people of Piu Village, Samoa and free them from daily open-fire cooking and expensive electricity by unlocking the free, green energy all around them. Stay involved and see the final outcome through a continuing series of video diaries!

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Team New Zealand, Kia KAHA

Being a girl raised on the Waitemata and with dad having several boats ...I spent much of my weekends sailing and being around the water...lots of parties down at Uncle's waterfront bach with my friends.
great times indeed ....I loved it all.

Except, all of the above is a lie. I have only stepped on a yatch once in Asau and it was just to get on, eat really strange food like pasta and then step back on the concrete.

But...I got your attention, huh! 

Anyhow, today, Team NZ lost twice to Team Orakefs. 
People are feeling disheartened and sad. I am not even a sailing person, or a die hard fan, but I am beginning to feel it too....I really want NZ to win, I want them to win,.,,but it's like, 8-1 and now 8-8. 
lance Armstrong, have you got something to do with these victories?
Please Sonny Bill Williams, can you switch codes tomorrow?
Anyhow, HAVE FAITH. 
And anyway,  it is a millionaires game,,....clearly, NZ have run out of its kitty and the Americans are loaded.
Simple as that.
KIA KAHA DEAN BARKER....O o outou mama na....Go Team New Zealand!!!!!

In the meantime, here's some tips from Campbell Live about dealing with America's Cup blues:

Today in my life, what was memorable?

What stood out for me so I can look back and smile, or cry, or pull out my dentures and rock back and forth in fetal position later in life, in some well padded room? 

Patience, or lack thereof.
I just about threw my children out of the car this evening. The six year old was punching the 2 year old, and in retaliation, he ...wait for this....unclicks his car seat (while we're on the Northern Motorway) ...and bit her on the shoulder.
Both cried, pulling hair and I could not pull over, so I had to yell death threats while trying to slow down and calm both down. 
Patience, is something I lacked at that moment. I just wanted to...silence both. Briskly.
I love my children. Most of the time. Other times, I want to kikiga them. (Kikiga means hug).

Money and Influence = A Better Education
You can say all you can about decile ratings being irrelevant and all, but if you walk into a wealthy school and the walk into a decile 1.... Honey, success is more accessible in the former...but not necessarily the drive, or the desperation to excel. 

Auckland traffic is depressing on a normal day, but when it rains, It's an asshole of a place. Len Brown do something.

In an unrelated note, I was inching my way towards the motorway at the newton onramp - it takes about 15 minutes and its 2 lanes. this is where I text frenchy to let him know where I'm at - if I'm late to get the 2 shits (aka, my lovely children) or if traffic is good. Halfway through my texting, I sense the people in the next car gesturing and I thought *aw feck. Don't you tell me to stop texting, I have my period and I could hop out and punch you and then facebook about it while driving* but then I realised, oh, I know the people, they are my in laws relies who I've had a drink or seven with on a few occasions. Great times! go down, and we launch into a you don't, on a New Zealand on ramp at peak traffic...O a mai? Holidays okou next week? ..oka, long time......ia, afea kou ke o ai? Dah Dah Dah" 
Take the coconuts out of Samoa but......

Okay, none of the above is memorable or worth remembering ....but that was a fun exercise. 

Said no one ever. 

In case you think I'm being dramatic, meet my 2 year old, ...and yes, that is a popcorn bag when they walked out of the movies this evening. This is his idea of fun. Frenchy of course encourages him on. He is different this boy. Very different. I will start using the s word soon. 

Monday, September 23, 2013

The nurse sister of mine who works

with children living with disability.

She's pretty calm and collected until someone says something off about disability, and then you get  the verbal uppercut. I like what she wrote below and its when I go to see her in her workplace that I realise how meaningless most of our jobs are....and how much nurses do to help people, but get little recognition. 
I take my invisible tuiga off to every nurse, who work long hours, get poor pay, but till get out of bed to make someone else's life better.
You're amazing! 

Her comment about the use of language: 
"The use of language and words describing people with disabilities has changed over time. 

It's important that people are aware of the meaning behind the words they use when talking to, referring to, or working with the Disability Community. 

Disrespectful language can make people feel excluded and can be a barrier to full participation. Recognize that a disability is not a challenge to be overcome, and don't say people succeed in spite of a disability. 

Ordinary things and accomplishments do not become extraordinary just because they are done by a person with a disability. 
What is extraordinary are the lengths people with disabilities have to go through and the barriers they have to overcome to do the most ordinary things. People with disabilities are - first and foremost, people - people who have individual abilities, interests and needs. 

For the most part, they are ordinary individuals seeking to live ordinary lives.

 People with disabilities are mums, dads, sons, daughters, brothers, sisters, friends, neighbors, coworkers, students and teachers. Promote understanding, respect, dignity and positive outlooks"

Fa’amalo lava i faiaoga ma tamaiti aoga o le Loto Taumafai. Manuia galuega o le vaiaso."

Sunday, September 22, 2013

The race that wasn't to be, and whats ahead this week...

We got up super early to go watch the final of Americas Cup this Sunday morning, only to find out 5 steps from Shed 10 that the race has been called off....ah well, at least we're all out of bed at 8am on a Sunday...what a record.
La Tuif and I went to Salvation Kitchen: best food ever,
...and to top it off, they have cute home-made toys that kids can play with while you eat your delicious bagel with salmon,  capers, fresh salad hollandiase sauce and more..
I love this place.

This week, what will I be aiming for?
-To prioritize and complete my tasks at work, at completing tuiga orders, at etc etc.
-To keep the house neat.
-To enjoy the time in the Tron with the departing comrades and achieve my tasks
-To have mindblowing hot sex (according to Coconut Girl)...but really, ... nada.
-To bring peace to the Middle East
-To conquer the world in my fabulously amazing way

But mostly, I aim to have the power and drive to roll out of bed each morning.

So help me all Deities and the Pharisees.

Have an average week y'all....keep those expectations down and be happy in the skin you're in - warts, po'us, lafas and all.

Thursday, September 19, 2013

The Big Sing winners 2013

Watch this years winners of The Big Sing...such a beautiful performance and makes me so proud to live in this country that embraces diversity so much that this is actually, expected, and appreciated.
Malo lava Westlake Boys and Girls.

You can watch the rest of the finalists on the above link.

Totally going to next years one since its in Auckland Town Hall.

Friday, September 13, 2013

Fashion Designer brings out a dress that she describes as "Aztec"

except...its the most common Fijian masi patterns that you buy from any fabric shop in Lautoka and from

What a joke.

These images below are copied from her website:  the dress is called Aztec Linen Dress.


Clearly she just copied the masi designs and called in whatever she felt like,
No shame whatsoever.

Old folks can shag

So the last few weeks, I've been very busy with my Aunty on her RSA activities and errands.
The most recent was the Casino Night which raised more than expected for the Multicultural Group.
Anyhow, this story has many branches, so prepare for branch 1.

1. My Aunty relies on me for anything to do with technology, social media, emailing etc. 
I encourage and force her to understand all these new strange things, and it resulted in her doing a fun course about computers etc.
She calls me and proudly says "Niece, I now have an airmail, can you check it for me?"
Me: "Fantastic, what is your Email address aunty?"
Aunty "wait, wait, let me find my edress book...wait, it is evamyatt1978"
Me "At what? it is @gmail or hotmail or yahoo?"
Aunty: "'re the smart one, you should know these things!...wait, I'll call you back after my Coro pogramme"

1 hour later, she calls back "Niece, my airmail is evamyatt1978 at gmail . com and my password is 7237"

Pregnant pause.....

"Aunty...Is that your pin number?"


Branch 2: 

At the Casino Night, a couple who were well into their 60's were looooocking lips on the dance floor. Both are now single and part of the Golf section. Naturally, it became the conversation at our table of mixed ages. My Uncle 68 year old was cracking jokes about needing the blue pill. The younger ones were either crinching or saying awkward comments about how theres more to look forward to. 
It reminds me of that mechanical engineering comment  "E pala le kigo o le Mazda ae seki a le afi" choohoo

Branch 3:
All you young people, go sign up to a RSA near you, they are looking for new members. You don't have to be a war veteran. If it helps, alcohol is 1999 prices.  

Branch 3:
I need to hang out with people my age more, I'm actually blogging about RSA.


Thursday, September 12, 2013

Check out this online exhibition...fascinating!

Germans in Samoa online exhibition

Omg, my blog will be 8 years old in Nov.

That's a whole lot of fagogos and so much has happened since then.

I grew up, lived a little, my body has changed, ua popona ou susu ua tutupu o'u mind has err, gotten more umm, stranger by the year, my waistline has expanded a little, my backside has grown, but in a non JLo sort of way, my confidence has umm, skyrocketed, my mamaries have waned a little ...but I'm still friggin fabulous! 

And humble.

And weird.

I love it! 

thank you for reading my madness, I shall continue to write, with no real purpose in mind, no real audience, except the gazillion fans I have in my pretty little head, I shall remain anonymous for as long as this blog exists (even though my name appears sometimes: Goddess, remember that). 

Thank you to people who compliment my writing but really, you just want to smash my face. Thank you to my sister for copping it when someone angrily accuses her about the content, thank you to my blogger friends who change blogs as quickly as they change their undies, not naming names but Nyds hello, thank you to bloggers who have way too fabulous careers and lives who forget to blog, hi Fotu, BrighouseL, Swisshamo, and basically every blogger I've got here on the right. thank you to bloggers who write amazing shit and then delete them, hi Sita, thank you for bliggers who write about important things like family hi Mega and beautiful food hi Panipopo.
 Thank you all for reading and achieving nothing of importance in the process. I am pleased I have contributed absolutely nothing of value to your lives. Wonderful. 
Good Night.

Here's to another 8 years of fagogos mai Samoa Ma Le vasaloaloamalepoloaletamaloa. 

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Maori and Pacific parents need to be more involved in their students education.

I've just come back from yet another information evening held in a school. 
Labour Politicians and academics cry wolf about Maori and Pacific underachievement and lack of engagement. 
They say that they are disadvantaged and poorly informed about educational choices.
 Dr Damon Salesa keeps saying this, Ive also heard another academic, Efeso Collins say this, that the system is against them zzzzzz. 
And as a result, so much resource is driven towards raising Pacific and Maori achievement, scholarships, progression onto careers and tertiary blah blah. Great. 
But if you go to school expos at night, ...majority of parents that show up? 
They're Pakeha, Asian, and every other ethnicity and very few Pacific and Maori. 
I accept that there are 'legitimate' reasons for some, like doing shift work, no car, no legs to walk to school, no time to skip Shortland Street and go to school to be informed and support their student, and so forth.

Why should parents be involved? 
So they can be able to support their children better. 
So they can understand how the educational system works, including NCEA, which is now translated into Pacific languages. 
So that students feel supported and are aptly encouraged to choose options that they enjoy, and not because their mates are doing it. 
Because as a parent, it is your responsibility.

So my point is? we are our own enemies sometimes.
Sometimes, it is not systematic failures and poverty of opportunity or inequity.
It is much of the time, parents who simply do not prioritise their children's education.
Simple as that.

#Be involved, be informed, be aware, be relieved when your child succeeds. 

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

People who are making a difference in our community

I've been following the blog of this beautiful family for a while now.
And no, I have never met them before, expect for their blog but If you read the wonderful work they have with Lalomanu school, then you too will be in awe. 
They have continued something beautiful, heart warming and so so sincere, in memory of their  angel.
They continue to support and contribute books to the: 
The Clea Salavert Library, BIBLIOTECA CLEA SALAVERT in Lalomanu, so that children there will have access to reading material.

That is a gift which will keep on giving, when those very children become confident readers, passionate about the written word and driven to learn.

That might sound straightforward to you if you are from a modern country, but in Samoa - for most schools, books are hard to come by. Or at least, books that are intact.

Well done to the family of your angel Clea Salavert for doing this.
My faith in humanity is strengthened every time I read their stories.

Let this be a reminder to anyone going to Samoa on holiday - take books, crayons, pens, any stationery and gift them to the children.

And, in honour of their blog - I will attempt to translate the above blog entry in Samoan.
...omg this is hard.....

Ua fai sina leva o o'u faitau i le blog a lenei aiga i luga o le upega tafa'ilagi.
Ou te le'i feiloa'i lava i ai ae a e faitau i la latou umm, blog - e ese le manaia ma le maoa'e o la latou fesoasoani i alo ma fanau Lalomanu.
E ese le matagofie ma le fa'amafanafana loto o lenei taumafaiga, e manatua ai pea lo la alo lea ua fai i lagi lana folauga.
O lo'o lagolagoina pea e le aiga o Clea le fale tusi a Lalomanu ina ia maua ai pea e tamaiti avanoa e faitau tusi ai.

O lenei meaalofa e so'ona foa'i ma foa'i pea, aua e mafai ai e le fanau aoga ona faitau tusi ma ua avea fo'i a taiala ina ia fa'atauaina pea le aoga.

E tau leai ni tusi faitau i le tele o aoga i Samoa, e le pei o atunuu i fafo ua tele le tamaoaiga.

Malo lava i le aiga o Clea Salavert mo lenei taumafaiga.
So'o se taimi lava ou te faitau ai i a latou tusitusiga, e lagona le fa'agae'etia ile alofa (agalelei) ua fa'aalia.
(Thank you Sita for the help).

Manatua, a e malaga i Samoa, ave ni tusi faitau, peni, po'o isi ituaiga meaaoga e foa'i i tamaiti i Samoa.

O le'a ou taumafai e fa'aliliu le blog lenei i le faasamoa.

My goodness, that was a lot harder than I thought and I was tempted to edit the english to suit the Samoan - but I didn' apologies to the Professors of Samoan who are reading and going "Auoi!" at my's a try!
Liva liva aso e le faasomoa ua'u


My faith in humanity in strengthened every time I read their stories.
Since posting this message about 15 minutes ago...I have had the above sentence translated on facebook by 4 people...It has been a long time since I've relied on Facebook for useful advise and even more humbling is that people are willing to help me, Thank You!
Quandolita: E mausali ma tumau le faatuatua ona o le alofa tulai e faaalia pea i tusitusiga faapenei.
Moira: Soo se taimi ou te faalogo ai i tala faapea, e faamausali atili ai le faamoemoe ona o le alofa tulai ma le agalelei faaalia.
Falaniko: Just a humble suggestion, rather than tusitusiga (writings), how about 'tala' (stories) or 'tala tusitusi', and humanity = human kindness/behaviour -" fa'atamali'iaga"or "uiga fa'atamali'i o tagata"?????? Not too sure myself. might even be botsing it hahaha

Monday, September 09, 2013

Miss Samoa, Tattooing(zzzzz), Miss World Samoa.

This last week, two topics were contaminating my newsfeed:

Tattooing and in the last few hours especially, pageants.

The Tattooing issue has been discussed countless times, and some people continue to be divided over it, then the issue waned (phew)...but wait, Nike gear came around and it became the subject of zzzz conversation again.
Anyhow, read the article at Samoa Observer.

I have always said this,...I will get my malu as soon as my modelling career is over, but in the meantime, my Milan, New York contracts are not allowing it....and it also doesn't look great when I'm wearing my two piece in St Tropez.

So yeah, all in good time....all in good time.

And Suluape is making a lot of money out of tattoos, so duh....of course he would encourage every Sione and his cousin brada to get inked!

Now - pageants.

Miss Samoa was won by the beautiful Susana Fanueli. Thank you Kristian for the following update and thank you Bluesky for the live feed - we were able to watch it all.
3rd Runner up: Miss Samoa Loko Style
2nd Runner up: Miss Mahealanis 
1st Runner up: Miss Samoa Australia
Miss Samoa: Miss Apia Insurance Company
Traditional wear: miss Samoa Australia.
Sarong: Miss Mahealanis
Puletasi: Miss Samoa Australia
Internet: miss Veronica's
Personality: Miss Samoa Loko Style
National Tourism Award: miss Lavashe Couture
Photogenic: Miss Apia Insurance Company
Best Talent: Miss Apia Insurance
Best Interview: miss Mahealanis

And like every year, before the poor girl gets crowned, the conspiracy theorists are hard at work. Just relax people! Don't get yer tarpaulins in a twist!
Any young woman who has the courage to stand in front of critics and be judged is a winner in my eyes. 
But - I must say, the emcees were not great,...there should have been someone who could speak both languages competently and also allow the girls to answer in Samoan, because apparently, its was a ..Miss Samoa pageant? 

Also, still on pageants, Miss World Samoa is now in Indonesia competing for the first time since ages ago, all the best Penina Paeu. You can download the app and vote for her..sorry no time to share the link. check out the FB page

This week, I look forward to - nothing....I just want to survive it and still reach Saturday looking like a million dollars....which is like, always. (Miss Disillusioned right here).

I leave you with:
"World peace and harsher corporal punishment for parole violators" 
Gracie Hart, Miss Congeniality
All images below are copied without permission from the Miss Samoa FB page


Friday, September 06, 2013

Gus C posted this on YouTube, oka se pauga aka sole

Thursday, September 05, 2013

Awkward moment today

Talking to a bunch of young people about programme planning, all 5 looking at my ipad as I demonstrate how it's done...then back to their own sheets, we refer back to the ipad and up pops a Facebook notification, "Keste, get me some pancakes from the shop across the road on your way back, and stop bullshitting the kids" 

The message for today is? Figure out how to turn off those blimming notifications. 

Tuesday, September 03, 2013

Hate poems? ...Make these two poems the only ones you will read then...

Matangi Tai by Sia Figiel

I have never heard of this sad story until now.

and thanks to Tuesday Poem, they've also linked to this poem:

Now,..I can see through the kamputer screen that all 3 of you who read my blog are already switched off with the word "POEM" but rest easy, the poems written by this author are ...beautiful, soul searching and best of all, even an un-literatured (new word right thuuur), untrained anti-poem goddess like me - is loving it.
So if you hate poems,....make these the only two poems you will even read.

Deadlines coming up for great opportunities

and its moments like these that makes me want to uppercut myself for not being able to do all these...I guess I'll just have to be content with being amazing and give others a chance to excel (my god I'm so humble today).

Please - if you qualify for these, then apply now!

If you don't quality for these, and you lack the academic requirements or experience, then work towards it, look for the criteria and give yourself something to work towards. Study. Find a mentor. Join a network of people who can inspire or simply talanoa with you.
Stop sitting on your muli and be proactive and get out there and grab the bull by the horns....if you are too lazy now, all you'll be grabbing later on is the bull's fuams

Your call…..

UN Careers Young Professionals Programme
Young Professionals Programme
United Nations is recruiting for its young professionals programme. For young, high-calibre professionals across the globe, the application examination is a platform for launching a career at the United Nations. This programme builds upon the national competitive recruitment examination (NCRE) which was held for the last time in 2010.

Apply for a Chevening Scholarship
Applications for 2014/15 Chevening Scholarships are now open.
To apply for a Chevening Scholarship you should check your country page for details of priority areas and any specific information that applies to applicants from your country, including the closing date for applications.
Before applying, it is imperative that you thoroughly read the Guidance for Applicantsand the Terms and Conditions for Chevening Scholarship Awards as these contain important information on what details you will need to include in your application.
All applications for a 2014/15 Chevening Scholarship must be submitted online by completing the Chevening Scholarships online application form. Instructions on submitting your application can be found in the Guidance for Applicants.

Facebook pages to “like” and get more info about scholarships/grants etc:
Pacific Scholar: most updated one out there
Emerging Pacific Leaders Dialogue – EPLD
Pacific Perspectives Pacific Island Society etc ..gee, everyone’s running a pacific something these days!

Monday, September 02, 2013

This week

I need to do some fargen work. 
and stop doing friggin facebook and all that shoot.
So if you see me updating, its because i am NOT working, or i'm job seeking.
Thank the Lord Almighty my real name is not on here......if you see me on FB, can you please tell me to piss off and do some work please?
Good bye,
Lady Macbeef.