Monday, October 17, 2011

The Orator and the Doctor

At the doctors with mother dearest:

Doctor: Where does it hurt?

Mom: My leg, foot and thigh.

Doctor: What do you do for exercise?

Mom: Ia, I walk, do jazzercise with my group, I always do my breathing exercises...(and she pauses dramatically, straightens her back and inhales coolly in a Hollywood demonstration)...and of course, I played hockey and netball (back in the 50s but hey, whose counting?).

Doctor: Have you had any accidents before? Maybe a fall? Anything u can recall?

Mom: No..................................................No not really.
Well, I did have an accident when I was dancing, (and she looks at me)...e ke magakua? (I didn't). We were on a Tourism Road Show and you know foi a, we women, when we danced, we did the aiuli because there were no men in the know (and the doctor looks searchingly for the punchline) when I got down to do the aiuli, I decided to land on my backside....(and she's near acting this in the office).

Doctor: So what happened?

Mom: "Ia" and she gets up and does the faakaupaki, "I broke the bone. But it's okay...I went to the hospital and yeah, they killed off the nerve. Really, its not my back that's the problem, its my leg, foot and thigh".

Doctor: So, you had no other accidents then?

Mom: No, not at all.

Doctor: So, can you show me where it hurts?

Mom: "E fai aku a le ufa ae fesili soo mai"...and she shows where it hurts again.

Doctor: "Okay, let me organise for some xrays and bloods etc etc, we need to get you back on your feet dancing and singing Madam Dancer from the Pacific!"

Mom: "For sure, Dr Singh! Can't wait" and she gets up, she breaks out a pe'avao move much to the Doctr's amusement and then she breezes out of the room without a worry in the galo le vae lae laga ako ma le kagaka ga la omai. lol.

right-o...I just loaded the photos that have been in her highness' camera since 2010 and just to give you an idea about this character, her wardrobe is a myriad of colours and fabrics and bling and flowers and hey,  2 scarves are never enough to protect her shoulders from the blistering snows in Samoa....enjoy.


ulalei said...

*falls down laughing and laughing and laughing* I LOVE YOUR mum!!!!! she's my hero!!!!

Pusi nofo said...

Hahaha!! Go MOMMA!!! She sounds like an awesome lady!!

Coconut Girl said...

Bahahahahaha these balardy women from Safua, such drama queens. Still laughing i le galo o le ako ma laga housegirl ga la o aku haha.

Daffy said...

LOL thanks for the laugh today, your mum sounds like a wonderful character :)

Goddess said...

...oi ae a,'a a le aunky ae kuu le housegirl e kokogi le pili a le fomai...dramatic alright!
yeah Daffy, she is a character for sure...e nonstop entertainment,

Malelega said...

awww life as Mum's bag holder is always fun when you're not red with embarrassment choo hooo.


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